An 18-year-old Redditor, tired of being treated as the “practice kid” by his parents, opens up about years of unfair treatment
- The oldest of five kids, a teen says he was held to stricter standards and denied privileges his younger siblings received
- After discovering his parents saved for his siblings’ college but not his, he moved out and refused to let them attend his graduation
- He told his parents he’s “done being their practice kid,” and found support from his grandparents
An 18-year-old teen turns to the Reddit community for advice after years of feeling like his parents’ “practice kid” have finally pushed him to his breaking point.
“I wasn’t allowed to spend a lot of time with friends as a kid,” he writes in his post, describing the strict rules that seemingly applied only to him and not to his younger siblings. He explains that while he was kept home, his siblings were allowed to visit friends’ houses from as young as 4 or 5 years old.
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When he asked his parents why the rules were so different, he says, “They told me that I was their practice and they didn’t want all their kids to whine into their face about missing out.”
This explanation became a painful refrain as he noticed more and more discrepancies in how he was treated compared to his brothers and sisters.
The teen shares that even mealtimes were a battleground, with his parents enforcing a rule that he had to clear his plate completely, no matter how full he was.
“If I was full and left, say three peas or something, I was forced to stay and finish or they’d be taken aside and served to me next time,” he recalls. His siblings, however, were not held to the same standard, and when he questioned it, his parents simply said, “They learned from me.”
The differences didn’t end there. “My parents were always super pissed off and angry when I got less than As,” he says, describing how he was grounded and forced to do extra chores for a month for bringing home a B, while his siblings could get Cs and Ds without consequence.
When he brought up the unfairness, his parents often repeated that “I was their practice run and they learned from things with me,” he claims.
He acknowledges that parents naturally learn as they go, but he says, “They learned with me and gave the benefits to my siblings. I saw none.” The teen points out that his parents never apologized for being hard on him or for yelling, and that the double standards extended to chores, gifts and even curfews.
“Expectations for chores were way higher with me always, birthday and Christmas gifts were way different and noticeably so to make both sides of the family question what they gave me because it seemed so little compared to my younger siblings,” he shares.
He also wasn’t allowed out past 4 p.m. during the summer, even as a teenager, he claims, and missed out on birthday parties that his siblings could attend.
The final straw came when his guidance counselor asked about college savings, and he realized his parents hadn’t saved anything for him, even though they had for his siblings. “It was when I knew I was done,” he says, describing how he kept his head down for a year before finally leaving home.
After graduating, he made the decision not to let his parents or siblings attend his graduation ceremony. “Instead of claiming some [tickets] for them I got them for my grandparents instead,” he writes, explaining that his parents were furious when they found out, though his grandparents were happy to support him and his paternal grandparents even let him move in with them.
When confronted, he told his parents, “I was done being their practice kid and I refuse to keep it up anymore. I said they can f— up with my siblings and learn to live with it because I’m not here to be a punching bag while they get the best versions.”
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His parents responded with anger, accusing him of all kinds of things and calling him names. But the teen has stood firm, saying, “I’m truly so done.”
One commenter empathizes, saying, “I get being the ‘practice kid’ or in my case the guinea pig as my dad like to say, but once they realize one thing isn’t working and they need to adjust that means they need to adjust with you, also not continue down the same path with you and a different one for your siblings.”
Adds another, “I truly don’t understand why they didnt eventually let up on you and tell you something positive Certainly not fair, and imo mentally abusive. Hope your grandparents are doing right by you and that you get yourself on firm footing, setting up your future.”
